Day 8; Finding Meaning & Purpose

In Viktor Frankel's 1946 book Man's Search for Meaning he chronicles his experiences as a concentration camp inmate and describes his psychotherapeutic method of finding a reason to live.

After eight days of 24 hour care for my mother-in-law, I have drawn the conclusion that there are many similarities to Viktor Frankel's experience and what my MIL must feel. She is searching to find meaning and purpose in a life that can no longer afford her the freedom of decision making and socialization that she once loved. With the state of her current mental capacity the daily living dilemmas about what to wear, putting on make-up, and bathing are difficult tasks that require concentration and supervision by others to keep her on task.

As a former career counselor, I understand how working impacts so many aspects of our well being, self esteem, and feelings of self worth. Finding something we love to do and are good at gives us purpose and meaning in life. For my MIL, she wants purpose and meaning but is limited in her ability to do certain things that once were very easy for her. Therefore, we look for things each day to give her to "do". Her lack of having things to do as we saw when she was in the assisted living facility definitely played a role in her not so positive outlook on life.

In the last eight days of staying in our home, we have seen her exhibit a much improved outlook on life. She walked with us on an indoor track, has attended a 2nd grade school program, attended her granddaughters track meet,pulled weeds in the yard (definitely did not ask her to do this!), offers repeatedly to clean, wash dishes, and do laundry. These little things have given her purpose in a life that was lacking meaning and purpose.

It has been fun to watch her look "forward" to things she had once given up on ever enjoying again. But, I am running out of things to give her to do!

Thus the question, could she volunteer or help others to get her out of the house in a safe environment and by giving back she would experience a boost to her self worth? We'll see.